“A Haunting Loneliness”: What We’re Missing in Modern Healthcare
“At the enchanted metropolitan twilight I felt a haunting loneliness sometimes, and felt it in others—poor young clerks who loitered in front of windows waiting until it was time for a solitary restaurant dinner.”
— F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby
There is something timeless and true in Fitzgerald’s line—capturing a kind of ache that echoes far beyond city streets and solitary dinners. It is the feeling of being surrounded and unseen, scheduled and disconnected. A feeling that, for many, now defines their experience not just of life, but of healthcare.
Today, loneliness is more than a literary theme or private ache—it’s a public health crisis.
Loneliness and Health: The Data We Can’t Ignore
According to the U.S. Surgeon General, social disconnection increases the risk of premature death as much as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day. It also contributes to a higher risk of heart disease, stroke, depression, anxiety, and cognitive decline【source: HHS.gov】. One in two Americans now reports measurable levels of loneliness.
And yet, this epidemic—quiet, insidious—rarely gets the same attention as blood pressure or cholesterol. That’s a mistake.
We can’t talk about preventive health without talking about loneliness.
Are We Lonely, or Just Alone?
Angela Duckworth and Mike Maughan explored this on the podcast No Stupid Questions, parsing the important distinction between being alone and feeling lonely. Some of the most isolated people live in full households. Some of the loneliest people have packed social calendars. As Duckworth explained, loneliness is the gap between the relationships we need and the ones we perceive we have. And the wider the gap, the deeper the toll. This tracks with what the Kaiser Family Foundation found: 22% of U.S. adults say they often or always feel lonely. It also aligns with what many of us feel intuitively—our days are full, but our lives feel thinner.
We’re living through a paradox: more ways to “connect” than ever, and fewer experiences of being truly known.
We Were Warned
In 2000, political scientist Robert Putnam sounded the alarm in Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community. He documented a steep decline in America’s social capital—fewer bowling leagues, church groups, community choirs, and civic clubs. Fewer places where people saw each other weekly, in person, for no other reason than to be human together.
The metaphor was powerful: we were still bowling—but we were doing it alone.
Putnam’s research was both rigorous and prophetic. It is hard to believe it was published nearly 25 years ago—especially since many would argue that our connectedness has only weakened since. Putnam argued that social networks aren’t just nice extras—they’re what make democracies, economies, and lives flourish. Without them, everything else gets harder: education, safety, mobility, trust.
And, yes—health.
What This Has to Do With Us
At Storyline Health Navigation, we can’t solve loneliness. But we can stop pretending it has nothing to do with how people experience care.
So we slowed things down.
We built longer visits. Continuity with providers. Enough time to know someone—and enough time to be known. We begin every new patient relationship not with rushed questions but with a careful review of the health story that’s already been written.
And we did all this not to be “different” but because it’s the only way that made sense.
You can’t outsource human connection. You can’t speed-run trust.
So instead of optimizing for speed, we optimized for meaning.
Because What Are We Really Trying to Prevent?
Preventive care isn’t just about avoiding disease. It’s about building the kind of relationships and rituals that help you stay grounded—so that when something does go wrong, you’re not alone in it.
That’s the heart of Storyline. That’s our answer to a culture that pushes faster, but leaves us emptier.
Loneliness may be our generation’s great unspoken diagnosis. But we believe there is still time—and space—for healing.
One longer visit.
One steady relationship.
One real story at a time.
References:
U.S. Surgeon General (2023). Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation. HHS.gov
Kaiser Family Foundation (2023). Health Tracking Poll on Loneliness
Fitzgerald, F.S. (1925). The Great Gatsby
Putnam, R.D. (2000). Bowling Alone: The Collapse and Revival of American Community
Duckworth, A., & Maughan, M. (2024). No Stupid Questions podcast
